Thursday, February 23, 2012

On health care, being poor, and idiots.



Keeping to my plan to work on getting my heath issues dealt with, I am now facing the supreme idiocy that is communicating with my local hospital.
Before I go through with the testing that my doctors want to order, a sleep study and a colonoscopy (worry not, I shall be SURE to make a fun-filled post about that joy), I wanted to make sure to be responsible by procuring patient assistance BEFORE I run up any bills. This is a boring and tedious process of listing all money I have touched in the past year, having notarized statements made of every cent of help anyone has bestowed upon me, and proving that I am not lying by providing documentation of everything. Part of that is proving that I am not eligible for medicaid, which should be as simple as looking at the fucking eligibility requirements for medicaid and seeing that I DON'T MEET THEM!  Oh, too hard, well, they could look in their damned files because they approved me for patient assistance back in June when I had my MRI done, and see that I wasn't eligible for medicaid in September when I was last eligible for their patient assistance program, and match that with the pregnancy test I took yesterday that proves, yup, still no kid, and TADA, APPROVE ME, YOU ASSHOLES!
But no, I have to apply for medicaid so I can be turned down (however long that takes) and then I need to turn in documentation that I was turned down, and THEN I have to wait for them to make up their minds as to whether, being poorer than I was last time they approved me, I am eligible to be seen in their stupid jerk hospital. Last time it took a year and a half to be approved...
It kinda feels like they would like me to die so they don't have to pay for me to have tests to make sure I don't die. At the very least, it feels like they are supreme giant dum dum heads.



In other news, I am workin' towards working on a secret project, so hopefully we will have something non-sucky to look forward to!

15 comments:

  1. Oooooof. That is sucky. And I will not enter that hospital without gloves. Thanks for the tip.

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  2. Stupid poopy jerk heads. YAY AMERICA! FREEDOM TO DIE AS YOU WILL (as long as you don't whine and try to get healthcare). BOO!!!!

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  3. Bleh!!! I fucking hate the health care system, seriously.

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  4. There's not another hospital you can go to? This one sounds more like an Asspital.

    (The paper rubbing applies to hospital forms only, right?)

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    Replies
    1. Yes, only ones they ask for, or require, in order to allow me to have diagnostic tests. I wouldn't risk the butthole papercut otherwise.

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  5. I am going to start applying for health care next week, so I have the same thing to look forward to. I am not eligible for medicaid or masshealth (Masshealth is the free/low cost healthcare in Massachusetts). So now I have to find something I AM eligible for, and something I don't have to pay for because I do not have money or an income.

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    1. eek. Massachusetts sucks for health insurance. Particularly because you HAVE to have it, and it can be difficult to obtain. At any rate when I lived there this website https://www.mahealthconnector.org/portal/site/connector/ was super helpful. I ended up on what they call "commonwealth care" which is state insurance that is based on your pay rate. When i started on it I didn't have to pay at all, then after I got promoted at work I paid only $18 dollars a month. Anyway, I hope things look up for you soon.

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  6. Ugh! No bonus points for being a responsible adult I see, and no sympathy that you are trying to bu a colonoscopy, not a convertible!

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  7. i swear logic & common sense have died slow, painful deaths until all we're left w/ are idiots working in important fields that would help MANY more ppl otherwise. such a pain! sorry! :|

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    1. If the "that" refers to the idiots, it would be "who" but otherwise both that and which would work, but without the comma, "that" is appropriate. =)

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  8. ... or would that be "which would help...??" as soon as i hit publish i began to second guess my grammar!

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  9. You should come to the UK. You can walk into a hospital and shout "ME NO FEEL SO GOOD!", and they'll treat you for free. Of course, you have to wait nine months for a heart bypass and chances are you'll get Norovirus, but it's free! All free!

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  10. And if the UK isn't to your liking, move to Canada, which starts with the letter C, as does colonoscopy. I had two this year - colonoscopies, not Canadas, and they didn't cost me a thing. Except my pride and the jar of Vaseline.

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  11. What I think I find most baffling is the entire attitude that anyone would just be all like, "I'm going to pretend to be sick and just keep harassing doctors, LULZ!" Although there are good, caring doctors out there, a lot of them are ridiculously condescending, and in general everything is a clusterfuck. >:(

    If I knew how to perform actual colonoscopies (and not just play around in someone's butt) I would give you 12 of them back to back (or ass to ass, i guess)for free! Much love, lady. <3

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